Quick Post

I'm on vacation again? It feels so surreal. I don't think I deserve it, yet I know I do.

Lately I feel like my life is the song, Turn It Around - lyrics are:
All things are possible for you all things are possible
Nothing's too difficult for you nothing's to difficult
I'm ready for change ready for rain ready for favor I know you able to

Chorus: Turn it around open the windows of Heaven pour out a blessing overflow turn it around open the windows of Heaven pour out a blessing we cannot contain let it rain let it rain

You have turned my mourning to dancing you've turned my sorrow to joy you have turned my whole life around thank you thank you Lord

Amen, Jesus!

Vacation!

I'm so happy to be on vacation, last night I was just so tired, I went to bed around 10pm on a Friday night. But my body needed it and I feel much better. My stomach has been hurting me a bit so I didn't eat dinner but the funny thing was that I wasn't hungry until about 9am. I woke up at 630 rested but stayed in bed until 730. I love sleep!

This week should be good, but starting today should be fun. Rehearsal at 2pm, then hopefully seeing Vanessa for a movie. I have to do some cleaning and packing. Tomorrow is church all day - literally. I'm helping with logistics from 830-1pm then doing a choir thing in the afternoon. I'll relax all night and then Monday I'm off to Marlbehead!

I'm really looking forward to getting away from the city. It is very much needed. Sometimes the city is draining on me even though I love it. I'm never bored. But it will be good to feel like i'm in a cottage near the ocean. I'll come back rested and refreshed.

I'm so looking forward to the conference thats in two weeks. Its going to be fun! I'm really starting to come into my own at the job. I believe people respect me now, my classrooms seem to fall into place. It took all year and it was a hard year but I've learned not to take things personal with the teachers, I've gained a lot of self-confidence with the hard cases I had, I really learned a lot. I felt like I was getting paid for going to school since it was such a learning experience. I bet I can get into any grad school when I decided to go.

For now I should do a little cleaning but it felt good this morning to wake up early, rested and ready to go. 9 days left of vacation here I come!

Discovery Weekend

So this was a launch of the new program at church called Discovery Weekend. It was okay. I knew most of my gifts anyways and I've been feeling kind of drained. I am doing well at work, yay! But sometimes feel a little pushed and pulled in different directions. I guess thats the nature of my job. I was thinking how could I do one more thing that God wants me to do, well I guess if its His will, he will make it happen and it will be good.

One thing that came out of this short weekend of discovery, was that I love to lead and I love to sing. Well I already knew that...but I think I want to do a traveling singing group that goes around Cambridge and Somerville to sing God's word. If you are interested, please let me know!

There are some goals that I need to think about: getting a license. I would like to get over that fear of driving and get it by August, that would be a miracle. I would love prayer in that.

I feel so accomplished that this year is almost over, only about 3 more real weeks of work, because I am off April 21-25. Then May 5-8 is our conference in Norwich CT.

So things are good, I just have to not get overwhelmed with life thats all, but thats only human right??

I praise God in Jesus name,

Awesome weekend

It has been a great weekend! First Irma and I spent together most of the time and watched two good movies: August Rush and No Reservations. I think August Rush was better but both were about the same things, feeling abandoned in life and finding acceptance later. It all takes time. Thankfully I was never abandoned in life but I still have those feelings like I will loose my parents someday, but of course everyone goes through that feeling. I'm gaining my independence by living on my own, earning my own expenses as a 20 something year old should do by now! So it feels really fulfilling.

Today I had a long day of worship! First it started with worship at the Boston site. It was good to come together as a choir and a community, thats what it is all about, worshiping Jesus as a group and give it all to God. So that was good, I could feel the Spirit touch down n us.

Then we all headed back to the Cambridge Site, caught a little of the second service and got some more worship in and then had lunch -- pizza! yay! I take pleasure in simple things though I did have four slices, whoops!

Then we had rehearsal until 345ish. We have a concert Thursday. Its cool because some of the worship leaders are singing so we are a bigger choir, it makes sense since there are loud instruments so we want more sound.

So right now I'm pretty pooped, its a good thing I have tomorrow off to recover! I think I'm seeing my mom in the afternoon/evening. Then Tuesday its back to work and Irma is starting in my job and my boss should be back, should account for an interesting week. I'm looking forward to the concert though.

God is good, and I am very happy, just very tired :)

Long time, eh?

Well I know its been forever, I said I would update more but never did, I apologize. Work has been crazy! Though I'm starting to feel more comfortable. We have a lot of issues and they built up and we finally had to resolve them last week but you know what? I'm learning a lot. I feel like I'm in an internship but getting paid. I know for sure I want to go into human services - more towards the macro end of it but at least I'm getting the micro expereince. I would love to lead a non profit someday. Who knows how long I"ll be here? But I think it will be at least 5 years before I get my Masters.

I finally have some breathing room. We have one kid who is autistic, we had to file on another kid and sporadic attendance in others. I have to call each parent where there is an issue. But I think I am getting it all. Its not that hard of a job, but I'm in a very supportive place.

Family wise, things are okay. I wish my family were different but I can't change that. My dad is sometimes rediculous. I wish when my brother died that I had more family but I'm making my own family now with church and work, so I think I have it pretty good. I've certainly worked hard for what I have and I'm proud of myself.

I am grateful for my mom for providing me with education. I feel like it gives me a heads up in this job. I know a lot more than I think I know.

I have to stop complaining and start realizing that I HAVE A LOT. I have God, I have a wonderful job where I can grow, I have a faith community where I am appreciated and connected to, I have both my parents no matter how flawed they are, I have a supportive boss, friends, my health, health insurance, food, roof over my head, some savings and happiness. I think thats all I need right?

God is good and I just have to remember that!

God knows all and knows the right timing

John 2

The Wedding at Cana

¹ The next day^[a] there was a wedding celebration in the village of Cana in Galilee. Jesus’ mother was there, ² and Jesus and his disciples were also invited to the celebration. ³ The wine supply ran out during the festivities, so Jesus’ mother told him, “They have no more wine.”

⁴ “Dear woman, that’s not our problem,” Jesus replied. “My time has not yet come.”

⁵ But his mother told the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.”

⁶ Standing nearby were six stone water jars, used for Jewish ceremonial washing. Each could hold twenty to thirty gallons.^{[b] 7} Jesus told the servants, “Fill the jars with water.” When the jars had been filled, ⁸ he said, “Now dip some out, and take it to the master of ceremonies.” So the servants followed his instructions.

⁹ When the master of ceremonies tasted the water that was now wine, not knowing where it had come from (though, of course, the servants knew), he called the bridegroom over. ¹⁰ “A host always serves the best wine first,” he said. “Then, when everyone has had a lot to drink, he brings out the less expensive wine. But you have kept the best until now!”

¹¹ This miraculous sign at Cana in Galilee was the first time Jesus revealed his glory. And his disciples believed in him.

¹² After the wedding he went to Capernaum for a few days with his mother, his brothers, and his disciples.

Jesus Clears the Temple

¹³ It was nearly time for the Jewish Passover celebration, so Jesus went to Jerusalem. ¹⁴ In the Temple area he saw merchants selling cattle, sheep, and doves for sacrifices; he also saw dealers at tables exchanging foreign money. ¹⁵ Jesus made a whip from some ropes and chased them all out of the Temple. He drove out the sheep and cattle, scattered the money changers’ coins over the floor, and turned over their tables. ¹⁶ Then, going over to the people who sold doves, he told them, “Get these things out of here. Stop turning my Father’s house into a marketplace!”

¹⁷ Then his disciples remembered this prophecy from the Scriptures: “Passion for God’s house will consume me.”^[c]

¹⁸ But the Jewish leaders demanded, “What are you doing? If God gave you authority to do this, show us a miraculous sign to prove it.”

¹⁹ “All right,” Jesus replied. “Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up.”

²⁰ “What!” they exclaimed. “It has taken forty-six years to build this Temple, and you can rebuild it in three days?” ²¹ But when Jesus said “this temple,” he meant his own body. ²² After he was raised from the dead, his disciples remembered he had said this, and they believed both the Scriptures and what Jesus had said.

Jesus and Nicodemus

²³ Because of the miraculous signs Jesus did in Jerusalem at the Passover celebration, many began to trust in him. ²⁴²⁵ No one needed to tell him what mankind is really like. But Jesus didn’t trust them, because he knew human nature.

Last week we discussed this in small group. How we can only trust Jesus when we see miracles. And how can we see those miracles when all we have seen is hurt? Read the last sentance carefully, No one needed to tell him what mankind is really like, but Jesus didn't trust them, because he knew human nature.

I'm coming to realize this in real life. People are not perfect, we are far from it. Therefore, we sin and mess up around each other. I have been putting my full heart into my job and love it, but I also realize that people do not know how to treat people and put me down. I have to realize that God knows this and hears my cries. I am not complaining, for I know this happens wherever I will go.

This passage in the bible is a good example of where we fall in mankind and why we need God and his perfect will and timing to bring us together.

Worship = Amazing

Its hard to put into words what worshipping a living God truly means until you experience it. You know the old saying...when you give yourself to others you feel good. Well that is what I feel when I worship God. Today was amazing, trusting in myself that it doesn't matter what others think about how we worship, just giving it to God and it will all work out. Today there were two sopranos. We had to sing a part just us two. I think 2-3 years ago I would have been so nervous but God has brought me to a place to be comfortable with who I am. We did it, and sung out. I heard my voice across the church and what an exhilaration knowing that not only am I comfortable singing outward and trusting my voice, but that I am comfortable with myself. I came home and looked in the mirror and loved what I saw. I truly feel like I am a beautiful person. Last night I slept beautifully. I am happy to get up in the morning. This is what happens when we trust our lives over to Jesus and He can turn our lives around. I am truly amazed.